Children's letters to relatives

Encouraging children to write regularly to relatives is a fine idea. Those hand-written missives may someday become priceless treasures, reminders of simpler days when Johnny, the company president, or Mary, the Secretary of State, was growing up.

In any case, even if those great expectations never quite materialize, the letters may still be carefully packed away, to be passed on and read with pleasure someday by Johnny's and Mary's children and grandchildren.

Relatives who are fond of the children and who are likely to respond should be targets for their first efforts.. It's very discouraging, even for adults, to send off hand-written missives to people who never reply, or who reply with a quick phone call or an e-mail.

Supply all the necessary materials: stationery, pencil, and/or markers and stamps. Choose a block of time when there are likely to be no distractions and help the child find quiet place to work, perhaps at the kitchen table. The parent may be nearby, but busy with other matters

A little subtle bribery sometimes will help to get the ball rolling. " We can get an ice cream cone on the way home after we've mailed your letter to Aunt Jane."

Don't insist that the letter be perfect. Spelling errors and incomplete sentences will be part of the childish charm to a doting, distant relative. In fact, doodles, and "pictures" from the hand of a toddler will be most welcome. It's never too early to work on instilling good habits.

It's the child's letter after all, and he should be allowed to take ownership of it. Nothing will discourage him faster than insisting on perfect spelling, proper paragraphs and setting a mandatory number of pages that he must produce.

There are many advantages to having children correspond regularly with relatives:

* It helps family bonding. A relationship is established between the child and his or her relative. It's expanding his world, and that's beneficial. It's another stage in the growth process.

* It's an important step in his language development. He is learning that there are other effective ways to communicate besides talking.

* It's practice in self-discipline. Most children, given a choice, would opt for continuous playtime. Writing, or drawing a picture that someone else will enjoy entails effort, of the type that will be expected of him in school.

* Activities such as writing, printing, drawing and colouring help to develop a child's small muscle control. With extra practice at home, his marks for neatness in school may soon show improvement.

* Thank-you notes are especially valuable and important. They instill the virtues of gratitude, thoughtfulness and appreciation of another's effort on the child's behalf. If the practice is carried on consistently thoughout childhood, it will establish a basis of good manners which will be carried on throughout life.

Corresponding by means of a hand-written letter is a worthwhile practice not just for children, but for all of us. In the fast-paced life of the twenty-first century, with its shortcuts and time-savers, its texting and e-mail, the enjoyment of receiving a personal message, penned just for you, and delivered by snail-mail is becoming a lost pleasure.

Would you cheerfully relinquish those old letters you've saved from parents, grandparents, or the lost beau who meant so much at one time in your life? Most people would definitely decline to do so.

Don't deprive Johnny's and Mary's descendants of that same pleasure. Seat the children at the table and do your utmost to make them comfortable and secure with the art of letter writing. Generations to come will appreciate your efforts.